There may be 50 million caregivers in the United States, but you feel all alone. You’re stuck at home, going to and from a nursing home or care facility, you’re curled up on that oh so not-comfy orange final chair next to your loved one in a hospital for weeks–isolated, scared, cut off from the life you once lived–and you wonder how long you can keep doing it.
The loneliness and isoluation that comes with caregiving can feel like the last crippling blow. Caregiving takes otherwise outgoing, fun, professional, engaged people and can make you feel like you’ve been put in the proverbial time-out chair with your nose to the corner of life.
Even if you could get out–where would you go? You can forget how to have fun, how to interact with “normal” people, too exhausted to get dressed and meet a friend for lunch, or too concerned to make your own medical appointments–what would you do if they actually found something?
Believe it or not, there’s more caregiving support out there than you probably realize–in your own community, and online.
Where can you go to find caregiving support?
- Online caregiving sites, blogs and forums.
- Check out Caring.com’s new program for those with loved one’s struggling Alzheimer’s. “Steps and Stages.” is s a great way to plan for your loved one’s care, know what’s coming head, and tap into local community support.
- Join a forum focused on caregiving needs. You’ll find new friends who are going through just what you are going through–you can vent, get ideas, brainstorm–and just hang out. Some great online caregiving forums can be found at the Alzheimer’s Association site. Also check out Davita, iVillage, Elder-care, and Well-Spouse–each offering
Check out your own community caregiving support.
Go online or make a few calls to the Council on Aging, your senior community center, check with your loved one’s doctor, adult day cares, local care facilities have a list, elder affairs.org and make disease-specific organizations offer local caregiving support groups and activities. Start asking, taking notes, and finding what works for you.
Create Your Own Caregiving Tribe Support
Friends, neighbors, your clergy, your hair dresser, your cousin…a complete stranger you meet on a walk. Share your story. Share where you are. Don’t try to sugar-coat it. Don’t isolate yourself by your own doing–because you feel out of step with the rest of the world. Force yourself to get out, to talk, to share, and to listen.
Keep knocking until someone answers.
~Carol D. O’Dell
Author of Mothering Mother, available on Kindle