Caregiving Triage: Rising Above the Panic

Imagine a battlefield. People are wounded. Some are screaming in pain. Others are close to death. It’s easy to freak-out, but as a caregiver in the midst of your own war zone, you can’t afford to panic. You are the triage nurse. You have to float above the scene and figure out how to not [...]

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Searching For a Senior Care Facility for your Aging Loved One? 3 Tips to Consider

Last week I was asked as a Caring.com senior expert to speak on NBC Miami Live show and talk to folks in South Florida about how to choose a senior care facility for your aging loved one. Sometimes no matter how much we want to keep our loved one in their own home, or with us, it’s [...]

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How to Get Through Grief

Forget Kubler-Ross’s five stages of grief. They’re merely a jumping off point. Grief isn’t linear. Grief is multi-layered and doubles back on itself. Grief is raw. For many, it’s the closest a person comes to unhinging–to a break with reality. Getting through grief isn’t easy and isn’t predictable. Getting through grief is different for each one [...]

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The Oldest Woman Who Ever Lived: Aging with Wit and Grace, What Do You Have In Common With Her?

All of us worry about aging. Perhaps we should worry less–and learn from a pro. So, who’s the oldest person who ever lived? The oldest woman (that can be documented) is Jeanne Louise Calment. She lived to the age of 122. Born in Arles, France, February 21, 1875, and left this earth on August 4, 1997. Now, that’s impressive–but [...]

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When Alzheimer’s Turns Violent and Dangerous: What’s a Family to Do?

CNN reported this week on people with Alzheimer’s who develop violent tendencies. This is the silent story that many families don’t want to talk about.  Family members (aka caregivers) don’t want to expose their loved ones. These respected family members were once doctors, lawyers or indian chiefs, as the saying goes–Alzheimer’s is the great equalizer and doesn’t care [...]

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Celebrating My Mother’s 100th Birthday: 1911-2011

Today, my mother would have been 100 years old. I’m celebrating. She left this earth eight years ago, but she hasn’t left me. I spent the last three years of her life being her full-time caregiver and now, I’m back to being her full-time daughter. I feel the length and depth of our relationship. I [...]

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Caregiving and My Parent’s Marriage, Lessons Learned Along the Way

Caregiving my mom carried many ironic gifts. One is that I witness how love goes on–after death. My parent’s marriage lasted for 52 years. They faced the Great Depression, World War II (Daddy served for four years–in France, at the Battle of the Bulge, and then stayed to help rebuild the country), a miscarriage, an inability to [...]

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Caregiving and Keeping the Love Alive: Do’s For Caregivers

Caregiving and romance doesn’t seem to go hand-in-hand, but in many ways, it’s the epitome of real love. To care for a spouse, to set aside other aspects of your life and even your marriage to care for an aging or ill parent or child, is about grown up love–the kind that gives, and at times, the [...]

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Alzheimer’s and Dementia Issues: Mom (or Dad) is Mad and Won’t Talk to Me

A friend of mine told me that she confronted her mom about her memory loss and told her she was concerned it might be dementia or Alzheimer’s. Like many caregivers her hope was that she could convince her mom to visit a neurologist. Instead, her mom got furious and now won’t talk to her. My friend [...]

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Women and Caregiving, The Truth About What’s Going on Behind the Front Door

Many people think that caregiving and womanhood go hand-in-hand. We’re nurterers by nature, we’re led to believe. Probably because they don’t want to do it (whoever “they” are). You’re good at it–so you should do it. We’re also good at cleaning the bathroom–not because we have a knack for it–it’s mostly because nobody in the house seems to even [...]

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